Increasingly, the civility of our great nation is being called into question.

In simple terms, civility is behavior and speech that has the aroma of kindness. There was a time when people could disagree agreeably — when people could and would listen to another person’s thoughts without interruption. What seems to be playing out in our culture today, on many fronts, has all the appearances of rudeness. The days of discussions and meaningful conversations are few and far between.   

This last weekend, two mass shootings in Texas and Ohio have once again brought gun violence and gun control to the forefront of our collective conscious. In the heart wrenching aftermath for survivors and those who lost loved ones, social media platforms have lit up once again with each side voicing their adamant objections about what course should be taken. Perhaps, most troubling is that no matter what the issue is, from gun control to racism to health care to The President of the United States, the willingness of each side to actually listen to the other has become rare indeed. The “winner,” if you can even call it that, is the side that shouts down the opposite viewpoint with the most unbridled gusto. Welcome to our current cultural reality, characterized by incivility.

The question before us is “Is there a way back, and if so, how?” At this very question, my belief is that Christians have a unique advantage (and responsibility) to look at how the Bible weighs in on the subject.    

Regardless of your view of the Bible, my experience is that it remains eternally contemporary.   Proverbs 29, for instance, conveys that “Scoffers set a city aflame, but the wise turn away wrath. … A fool gives full vent to (anger), but (the) wise … quietly hold back.” 

A few chapters before, the author of Proverbs, Solomon, writes, “Whoever restrains his words has knowledge, and he who has a cool spirit is a man of understanding (Proverbs 17:27).” 

In a story retold by Abdu Murray, he described what happened to a Muslim and a Christian who had sat down to discuss their beliefs in a spirit of civility. Murray stated,“The group of Christians began yelling at the Muslim for being a ‘liar’ and my friend for being a ‘charlatan’ just because he refused to polemicize the discussion.”   

Now compare this with what Paul, an early church leader, said to his co-worker in the ministry in Titus 3:1-2, “Remind the people (fellow Christians) to be subject to rulers and authorities, to be obedient, to be ready to do whatever is good, to slander no one, to be peaceable and considerate, and always be gentle toward everyone.”    

That last phrase, “and always be gentle toward everyone” really should shake us up in a good way whether we are a Christian or not. What if this was the way back to civility? What if kindness and gentleness was our first response? What if our willingness to understand a different perspective eclipsed our desire to be right?   

 

Greg Rensberry is the pastor at Mapleview Free Methodist Church in Niles. He can be reached at gregrensberry@yahoo.com