Borgess-Lee teaming up with church for divorce counseling

Published 8:00 am Tuesday, August 29, 2017

Going through a divorce is never easy.

Between fights over custody of children, battles over finances and the struggle to deal with life without a partner, the process of separating from one’s spouse is often a painful — and lonely — one.

Thanks to a partnership between Borgess-Lee Memorial Hospital and Holy Maternity of Mary Church, volunteers are hoping that local people dealing with the strife of divorce at least will not have to do so alone.

The Dowagiac hospital and church will host a 13-week divorce care group beginning Sunday, Sept. 10. The sessions will take place from 7 to 8:30 p.m. Sundays inside the Holy Maternity of Mary’s Rose Pavilion, 210 N. Front St., Dowagiac.

The sessions are free to attend, though participants are encouraged to purchase a workbook for $15 — scholarships are available for those who cannot afford to buy one out of pocket.

The support group will use materials from the DivorceCare program, which provides support to divorcees across the U.S., said Carolyn Strzyzykowski, Borgess-Lee’s chaplain and one of the organizers of the support group.

At the beginning of each meeting, the group will watch a video featuring advice from experts on divorce and recovery. Following the movie, attendees will have a chance to discuss what they watched as well as to share their own experiences in a talk facilitated by Strzyzykowski and several other volunteers.

“The classes are very casual and open,” Strzyzykowski said. “We want people to feel very welcome whenever they come.”

Topics will range from how to deal with anger, depression and loneliness following a separation to how to raise children in a joint-custody situation to how to pursue new relationships. Attendees are free to attend all 13 sessions or to pick and choose which ones they wish to attend.

“It’s like an emergency room,” Strzyzykowski said. “Whether you are just going through a divorce or you are ready to begin looking at aspects of life after a separation, you come whenever you feel you like you need to come.”

Strzyzykowski knows all too well the pain that comes with separating from one’s partner. Several years, she and her husband, Stan, went through a divorce. To cope with the pain, Strzyzykowski attended a DivorceCare program, which allowed her to vent her anger and sadness with others going through a similar situation.

“I really looked forward to attending my sessions with the group,” she said. “It was the one place I felt normal.”

After taking over as chaplain of Borgess-Lee in April 2016, Strzyzykowski met with members of Holy Maternity of Mary, who wanted to start a DivorceCare group in Dowagiac. Seeing it as an opportunity to “pay it forward” for the help she received in the past, Strzyzykowski took the idea to the Borgess-Lee COO John Ryder, who encouraged her to help bring the idea to life.

The hospital hosted a DivorceCare group last fall, though attendance was lower than Strzyzykowski anticipated. She and other organizers hope that moving the group to the church will encourage more people to participate, she said.

Helping Strzyzykowski with the upcoming sessions will be Missy Eblin, a member of Holy Maternity of Mary, and her husband Stan, who she has since remarried.

People interested in attending are encouraged to register by calling Strzyzykowski at (269) 519-2801, or by visiting divorcecare.org/findagroup and entering “Dowagiac” in the search box.