Esquire is just an ordinary guy. He does things in ordinary ways. He looks at things through ordinary eyes and makes decisions based on his ordinary points of view.

Esquire will never be accused of being normal, or typical, or commonplace, or conventional, or any of the other words that seem to be synonymous with “ordinary.” Having said this, it might be better to also explain what he is not.

There are some that think he could be considered strange, or eccentric, or weird, or odd, or any of the other words that are more akin to being “not ordinary.”

However, what they fail to realize is that Esquire is just unusually ordinary

Esquire gets up every morning. grumbles about his aches and pains, and then goes about his day. He works hard, stays busy, and never complains (except for when he is talking to someone). He eats healthy, gets a reasonable amount of exercise, and doesn’t drink to excess (except for the times when he does). He carps about politicians, reality TV “personalities,” and the price of nearly everything (yes, EVERYTHING!).

Very ordinary stuff.

If you need a helping hand, Esquire is there to share both of his. If you need a tool and he happens to have one, you can borrow his — just remember to bring it back, because he will remember if you don’t. If you are down on your luck and losing your way, he’ll be happy to give you a swift kick in the butt and point you in the right direction.

Still, all within the realm of ordinary.

He is just an ordinary guy, doing ordinary guy things, in a culture that seems to have forgotten the ordinary. He doesn’t swear during disagreements, because confusing his opponent with mispronounced big words is much more fun. He doesn’t judge, because that requires unnecessary effort — and he has gotten to a point in life where unnecessary effort isn’t worth the effort. He doesn’t say, No,” when being asked for help and he certainly doesn’t say, “no,” when it is being offered.

Esquire is an ordinarily sociable kind of guy. He enjoys the company of others. If he can’t find a wild reason to throw a party, he’ll find an ordinary one; such as, “Bring your grandson over. We’ll play ‘Rock-‘em-Sock-‘em Robots’, drink root beer, and watch cartoons.” By the way, yes, we do this nearly every Friday evening). Very ordinary stuff in an unusual sort of way.

Esquire is a real person. He is not a compilation of people that I have known, or would like to know. He is not an imaginary friend like the one my brother had when we were kids. He is “salt of the earth” ordinary. I am blessed to count Esquire as one of my closest friends. He is not just ordinary — he is the MOST ordinary person I know.

 

Larry Wilson is a mostly lifelong resident of Niles. His optimistic “glass full to overflowing” view of life shapes his writing. His essays stem from experiences, compilations and recollections from friends and family. Wilson touts himself as “a dubiously licensed teller of tall tales, sworn to uphold the precept of ‘It’s my story; that’s the way I’m telling it.’” He can be reached at wflw@hotmail.com.