Bill Bradford: Did Melvin need the ‘birds and bees’ talk?Published 11:05pm Wednesday, September 15, 2010
It just made sense that the horses were the daddies and the cows were the mommies.
Likewise, the dogs were the daddies and the mommies were the cats.
His curiosity was a normal part of figuring out the parameters of life.
He did not understand why the big folks said that Mrs. Scott was going to have a baby because her tummy had grown so big.
But after her baby had come, then her tummy was not as big any more like it had been.
And this talk of “the stork” didn’t make any sense either.
A couple of years later, when Melvin asked his mother, “Where do babies come from?” his mommy told him that a mommy and a daddy get close together and then God sends them a new baby.
Then how come their house wasn’t just full of babies?
Melvin saw his mommy and daddy hug and kiss quite often.
In the context of today’s world, parents need to confront these questions with their children earlier in the children’s development than in some decades of the past. The attitudes of the parents can shape home behaviors such that home relationships are kindly and respectful.
There can be a peace in the home which will undergird the home relationships with a contentment which makes the interpersonal relationships normally happy.
A healthful respect for each other and for themselves may serve as the natural background for counsels to beware of people who are predatory or too familiar.
Why confront these questions earlier now ?
A very few decades ago adultery was illegal and punishable by arrest by the law enforcement personnel in many jurisdictions.
Presently we have called this behavior “an affair” and pass it off with a nod.
It almost seems anachronistic that we should have ever been so up tight about this social interaction which is now so common.
With the advent of the Internet, public television and personal communication gear, children of this generation will be confronted by life’s intimate choices earlier than children of some of the past generations.
A very few decades ago the practice of sodomy was generally regarded as abhorrent.
It too was punishable by the secular authorities.
In our present society we may just dismiss it as anal sex and move on, regarding it as a “consentual private life style.”
Unfortunately, the self-centered choices some of us are making do trespass on the dignity and normal development of many of our children.
Our children need to grow up experiencing self-respect and respect by others so that they may eventually form adult relationships in which selfish interests do not destroy loving relationships in families of their own.
Kindly words and deferential behavior go a long way toward promoting harmony and peace.
Conversely, a few cutting or argumentative remarks may ruin someone else’s day.
Bill Bradford retired to the rigors of a small farm in Pokagon Township.
He has served as director of clinical laboratories in physician group practices and hospitals.
For a decade he was an educator in clinical laboratory sciences at Andrews University.